Life Consumes Me

Yeah, so I've definitely dropped the ball on this whole blogging thing.  I guess my high hopes of being a consistent blogger have crashed and burned.  I totally should have known this would happen.  I mean, it's easy to have high ambitions for the school year before the school year actually starts and I don't have hours (some days minutes) to let my creative juices flow!  Just thinking about those summer months when I got to wake up at 8, fix a "sit down" breakfast for the kids, do the laundry on a daily basis, watch television, read books, keep my house clean, run errands, make personal phone calls, get on the internet, etc., etc., etc., makes me even more happy for FALL BREAK!  I have honestly thought about blogging multiple times, but when it came to making a decision whether or not to read with my kids, give the kids baths, walk the dog, grade papers.... I guess those things continue to come first. 

And, that's just it... I started out the school year in full force!  I was pumped as usual to get things going and get everyone in routine.  Waking up was easy, getting things done was still fun at both home and school.  Then, the normal, stressed, bogged down, and woe is me syndrome started where I feel like I need to complain constantly about my lack of down time and how my life consumes me.  I hope I'm not the only working mother that gets like this!  There are seriously days when I want to lock myself in a dark room and not hear or say anything for hours. 

My goal is always to not get like that, but it has already happened.  The school year started out with 34 (x3) students who are nearly impossible to reach at the level I want to met them, an anxiety-driven six year old who wakes herself up thinking she's going to throw up, a kid living the terrible threes full out at home and in public, a dog that is as hyper as I don't know what and chews up everything in sight, soccer practices three times a week for the kiddos, Girl Scouts training/meeting/whatnot that completely stresses me out (because I have no idea what I'm doing), school work, school work, school work, laundry a mile high and all over the house, an ever expanding waist line (who has time to exercise--that's my excuse), bills to be paid during the school day (can't hours of operation end after I get off work???), tiffs with the hubs about who's carrying more weight, etc.  So, because of all this I whine, complain, cry, and then realize how each of these things are blessings and not curses (well...maybe not the weight gain). 

Thankfully, because my God is a great one and He created geniuses who invented Cymbalta... I regain my senses.  After all, a consuming life well-lived is a good thing as long as you're making memories and doing the will of God.  On top of that, God doesn't give you more than you can handle (He knew I'd be a better teacher to 24 (x4) students than 34 which is why He made it possible for us to get another fifth grade teacher!  Thankful for my small classes!!)

Bottom line... My life is busy and most times hectic.  My life is rewarding because it's so exhausting.  My life is meaningful and I'm thankful to live a life I love.