Dauntless

First of all, I struggled with what to title this post and found it ironic that my two choices came from a book that I just read, Divergent, by Veronica Roth and a book I just started by Christine Caine called Undaunted.  Our good friend Webster defines the word daunt as to frighten or dishearten.  I can honestly say that over the past week, there have been several days that I was daunted.  I was becoming overwhelmed with fears both rational and irrational and even doubted myself and how God was going to use my tragedy for the greater good. 

As I mentioned in a recent post, my church had invited us to come speak during our Celebration Sunday about the accident and how God is actively changing our lives daily through the healing process.  Up until about a week ago, I was so motivated to speak even though I am not by any means a public speaker!!  I was encouraged by people around me and God was stirring up a spirit of hope within me that I couldn't wait to share with others.  On the other hand, there were a few days and one in particular that I actually said, "I can't do it!  I will feel like a liar."  How was I supposed to get up on stage and tell people about how this tragedy was a blessing in disguise when I felt like I could barely function and felt unworthy of sharing because my fears were crippling. 

So, yesterday, was the big day... Celebration Sunday.  I had spent a lot of that night praying for courage and wisdom, but more importantly for what I was going to say to be about Him and not me.  I woke up yesterday morning super early, had some devotional time with my Bible and read a little more of Caine's Undaunted.  After reading about some of the horrific experiences of the girls who were involved in sex trafficking, I immediately felt guilty for the fears that I was allowing to creep into my mind.  Then, at the very end of my time reading another chapter, God spoke directly to me.  I am going to quote some of her ending words in hoping that they may resonate with you like they did me.

"...Reasons that, when we hear God's call, when we feel that gentle (or not so gentle) urging of God's Spirit for us to make a bold step, take a risk, serve others, save a life, commit- we so often hold back.  It's because we don't feel empowered.  We don't feel qualified.  We think we lack the courage, the strength, the wisdom, the money, the experience, the education, the organization, the backing....  Not me, God, I'm afraid.  Weak.  Poor.  Stupid.  Unqualified.  Daunted.... God doesn't call the qualified.  He qualifies the called.... There is no shortage of  ways life tries to daunt us, to render us incapable of following the bold and valiant plan God has for us.  This book is about how to move past that- how to become undaunted." 

 

It was then that I realized that Christine was right.  No matter our story, God calls us to be dauntless and to go after whatever it is He sets you to.  And, for me, yesterday morning, that was to tell my story.   Or, rather, His story because He is the one performing all the miracles and changing lives.  And, that is exactly what Kermie and I set out to do yesterday morning and boy was it amazing.  I have never heard so many encouraging words and stories of trials similar to mine.  And, so that is going to be my motto from this point on, "Dauntless."  Yes, there will be fears and yes, there will be hard days, but God has called me and it is up to me to respond how He needs me to respond. 

 

 

On a side note, after eating lunch yesterday, I drove again.  This time all the way from Jalepeno's on New Circle Road to the McDonald's on Newtown Pike.  Dauntless!  And, did we stop there?  Absolutely not!  We drove to the wreck site for the first time since the accident.  Dauntless!  It feels good to be letting go and moving on all with the help of an amazing God!  Today, I'm leaving you with a picture from our Celebration Sunday Service at church yesterday.